I got my student loan today. 10,145 dollars. I only have to pay back 7,000 too! This is good. now I just need to find a place to live ( Read more... )

Matthew you are so fucking stupid. Grow the fuck up and deal with your life you piece of shit.

When we used to lay next to each other our breath patterns would synchronize and you would tell me that it meant we were special and right for each other. Now, when I lay alone I pretend we're still breathing together. My heart still beats with your heart but it seems like your beat is speeding up to get away from mine. and your breath is slowing ( Read more... )

I feel so trapped in who I am right now. I feel like i'm at the bottom of a well that i couldn't possibly ever climb out of. What am I supposed to do to stop feeling so shitty. I can't even think of anything anymore.

On friday, I went to the doctor and cried for the full therapy session. She told me I should start taking my pills again. At least I don't have to worry about withdrawals anymore. The bad part is that until I can get back to my other doctor for a new prescription I'll have to keep taking the celexa that i had been taking that messed me around so ( Read more... )

How is it that sometimes when you think you are doing so well and feeling so much better, out of no where you spiral down to the shittiest place you can possibly be?

Im going to go get drink at the black dog.

Kyla faceplanted skateboarding yesterday and broke her nose and got a bunch of stitches in her face. all i want to do is take care of her and I can't. why can't i fucking talk to her for two seconds without crying. I do not even know the words to describe how sad and fucked up i have been. i fucking hate my life. i hate myself. i really need ( Read more... )

Man, Being broken up with is hard! who knew? even after all these months! (two)

Kyla broke up with me yesterday. I feel so bad. I can't believe she would do this. I wanted to marry her and have babies with her and be with her forever. I have never ever felt this shitty before in my life. I really just want to die. I treated her so good. I tried so hard so that I would never lose her. but she's gone all the same. i can't ( Read more... )